This Blaise Pascal quote seems simple, and not all that earthshaking at first, but breaking it down, I find that pain of loss, grief, is from mourning that fact that you are no longer the same and vainly trying to be–like a baby insisting on getting their own way–like you were before the person died.
When I read this quote I was renewed, freed of grief for that instant I understood its deeper ramifications.
To know that I am in fact no longer the same person, gives me the joy of accepting who I am in the present. It empowers me to know that there is only the present. Humans trying to make something stick –trying to make life like a painting that never changes–is what causes the suffering and grief.
Flowing as a LIVE person empowers and mitigates the suffering. Being in a painting or old photo is only pain and despair, and it is a lie because it isn’t real–you aren’t a real person when you try to pretend that painting or photo of a vision of some sort of perfect life, a fairy tale life, will sustain you.
I need to know that my loved ones who’ve gone would not want me to cling to old photos, that they were once vital in the here and now, loving life, not fixated to a false fairy tale of a life…and they want me to be vital too. They want more for me than they had. They want me to live in what they only glimpsed could be–a life fully empowered, with full capacity for joy, success, inner peace and love within my family and my community.
These things I have shared allow me to let go, yet keep the memories and learnings of the person and the past.
Maybe this post will help one of you who also suffers because your life isn’t the fairy tale you hoped for, or thought it should be–a picture painted (probably in childhood) on your psyche–a picture that never was and never can be real.
A picture that your mommy and daddy would be pleased to know you have flown beyond.